Swinging Etiquette

Arrive and leave as a couple Always, arrive as a couple, and leave as a couple. It won't be viewed favorably if one partner leaves early and the other stays.

Arrive on time It's not fashionable to turn up late to parties. You may make people who have already began swinging feel awkward by walking in late. It may also be harder for you to fit in. If you are going to be late, maybe due to traffic, give the host a call.

Be polite The swinging lifestyle is full of insecurities and uncertainties. Being polite may help ease this. Treat people in the way you want to be treated; sensitively, thoughtfully
and understandingly.

Be friendly Be friendly with everyone, even if you do not want to take it further with them. You may find you have other things in common, or they may introduce you to people who you are interested in.

Reply to all invitations Reply to all invitations, even if you do not plan to attend. It is very annoying when you’re the host, if you do not know how many people are going to turn up. Reply by either phone or an email, thanking them for an invite.

Don't arrive empty handed Call the host and ask them if there’s anything you may bring. Always arrive with something for the hosts.

Go prepared Take with you what ever you may need, toothbrush, comb, perfume/aftershave, Condoms, robe etc. If you’re sleeping over night then bring a sleeping bag and pillow.

Neat casual clothing and good grooming Always take a robe or negligee with you, you may find it more comfortable as the evening progresses. Keep money, jewellery and other such valuables at a minimum, it’s an embarrassment to you and your hosts if you lose them.

Your health and hygiene The main thing that may turn your potential partners off may be bad breath or body odor. Have a shower before you leave for your party, and it’s a good idea to freshen up when you get there.

Only do what is fun for you The whole idea is that you enjoy yourself, that’s why you are in the lifestyle. Do not be pressured into doing anything you do not want to, with any one you do not want to do it with. Remember, no means no.

How and why to say no The most basic and important swinging etiquette is the right to say no. A simple and polite 'No, thanks.' is all that is required. You do not need to explain your reasons. Do not be afraid to say no, every one has the right, and if you do end up doing things you do not want to it may cause more ill-feelings and embarrassment.

Do not be pushy If you fancy swinging with someone let them know in a nice, inviting way, if they say no, the answer is no, it's their choice. Do not ask them why, as this could be embarrassing and hurtful. If they say no, do not pressure them.

Alcohol Most people like a few drinks at a party. Drinking socially is fine, it may provide a good social platform to get to know people, it may also help you relax. Overindulging is not a good thing though, as it may hinder your physical and mental performance, and is a turn off for many people. If you need to drink heavily to participate in the party this isn’t the lifestyle for you.

Practice safer sex It is up to you to protect yourself and your partner. The use of condoms should not offend any one, it is not saying you're dirty, it is simply a means to protect all parties involved. Anyone not willing to use a condom is selfish and irresponsible. However, saying that, if all participating people are happy not to, it's your discretion.

Do not take someone to a party who is not fully informed This is an obvious one, don't take anyone to a party who doesn’t know what they're going to. It is very embarrassing for everyone, and will cause problems.

Do not take a ticket to a swinger’s party A ticket is someone who goes with you to the party just to get you in, but has no intention swinging, of course no one HAS to swing, but if one person swings, it is normally expected that the other one is willing to swing.

The group room is for group swinging As the name suggests, the group room is for group swinging, if you want privacy do not go to the group room, if you take your partner with you into the group room you should expect others to ask to join you, obviously you still have the right to refuse.

Do not disturb the swinging enjoyment of others If you’re in a bedroom or the group room, do not disturb the swinging of others with prolonged talk. This is a mood-killer and very annoying!

If a party is BYO, only drink what you bring BYO, also known as BYOB (bring your own booze), only drink what you bring, unless you are invited to share by others.

Do not be a bedroom cruiser Do not walk into bedrooms, peel back curtains, turn on lights etc. Accidents do happen, and this isn’t a problem, but if you become known for such behavior then you may find that you won’t receive many invites in the future.

Enjoy yourself Probably the most important one, approach everything with an open-mind and a positive attitude, act out your fantasies and enjoy yourself.

Tell the hosts If someone is causing a problem, if they are not taking no for an answer or they are being abusive, tell the hosts, they are more than willing to help.

Call to say thanks Always call or write to say thanks, for one thing it may get you invited again, and it will let the hosts know that they are appreciated for providing a good party.